When I was in high school, a man in ministry that I respected told me that the times of greatest spiritual attack in his life always came just before or just after God was going to use him in powerful ways. Now that I am living my life in full time pursuit of God's will and desire to glorify God with all I am (which has nothing to do with my vocation), I find that what he said is true.
It feels like when I've seen God work in great ways, or when I see God getting ready to move in great ways, I see Satan spring to action. For me, it becomes a head game. It becomes Satan whispering lies and twisting truth, making me irritable and uncomfortable. Feelings of inadequacy hits hard and if I'm not careful, it get's me down...REALLY down.
After I got home from Blitz, challenging young people to step up and receive God's call to spread the gospel, I was feeling kind of down, I was taking things people said wrong and I was just frustrated. Almost immediately I thought about 1 Kings 19. Elijah had just experienced great victory over the prophets of the false God baal and then ended a three year drought with a prayer. God had shown up big time, Elijah was on top. When Jezebel heard about this, she threatened his life and it sent Elijah into a depressive/suicidal tail spin which lead to a two month journey into the wilderness where God walked him through the process of understanding Elijah wasn't alone.
The culmination of the chapter is that Elijah had a poor perspective of the situation. Elijah WASN'T alone. he wasn't the only one and God showed him that.
A few years back Dr. Neely spoke at founders week about what the Word of the Lord has to say to those who are struggling and I went back and downloaded it and listened to it again. What an amazing reminder that God is always God no matter how we feel.
I wasn't on the verge of a depressive/suicidal stint like Elijah when I got home, but I was down. But God is amazing to walk me back into his presence and remind me of truth so that I can refresh my focus and see the big picture of his work in the world.
It feels like when I've seen God work in great ways, or when I see God getting ready to move in great ways, I see Satan spring to action. For me, it becomes a head game. It becomes Satan whispering lies and twisting truth, making me irritable and uncomfortable. Feelings of inadequacy hits hard and if I'm not careful, it get's me down...REALLY down.
After I got home from Blitz, challenging young people to step up and receive God's call to spread the gospel, I was feeling kind of down, I was taking things people said wrong and I was just frustrated. Almost immediately I thought about 1 Kings 19. Elijah had just experienced great victory over the prophets of the false God baal and then ended a three year drought with a prayer. God had shown up big time, Elijah was on top. When Jezebel heard about this, she threatened his life and it sent Elijah into a depressive/suicidal tail spin which lead to a two month journey into the wilderness where God walked him through the process of understanding Elijah wasn't alone.
The culmination of the chapter is that Elijah had a poor perspective of the situation. Elijah WASN'T alone. he wasn't the only one and God showed him that.
A few years back Dr. Neely spoke at founders week about what the Word of the Lord has to say to those who are struggling and I went back and downloaded it and listened to it again. What an amazing reminder that God is always God no matter how we feel.
I wasn't on the verge of a depressive/suicidal stint like Elijah when I got home, but I was down. But God is amazing to walk me back into his presence and remind me of truth so that I can refresh my focus and see the big picture of his work in the world.
1 comment:
i want to love god more probelm being when i ask god things he points me down the wrong path he allways ansers in riddles
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